What He'll Never Have
by SilberEngel
Summary: Draco loved Hermione, but now his chane is gone. An angsty songfic about Draco's unrequited love.........


Ok everyone, this is my very first songfic so I hope it's all right! It should be a pretty quick read, so even if it's bad it won't take up any of you're time! It's on the song "The Scientist," by Coldplay. I hope alot of you have heard of it. If not, it's not important. The lyrics to the song are more important than the song itself. Enjoy!  
  
~~^_^~~  
  
Draco couldn't take it any more. He quietly got up from the bench and the very end of the slytherin table, wishing he could be like all the others in his year, happy, celebrating, because it was their very last day at Hogwarts. As he got up to leave, he looked quite quickly over at the Gryfindoor table. There was Harry Potter, perfect little popular and famous Harry Potter. Sitting next to him, Ron Weasly. Draco's fist clenched in sad, miserable rage. And sitting next to him.........  
  
Draco turned away. Not wanting to think about her, not wanting to look at her, he traipsed unceremoniously out of the great hall.  
  
He walked quickly down the corridor, and out on the dusky grounds. No one would miss him. He was nearly invisible in their sea of uncharted happiness. He tried to think about other things. He would be leaving Hogwarts, getting a job, leaving home, leaving her.........  
  
Draco mentally slapped himself. Leaving her? What was wrong with him?  
  
He stopped walking, since he was at the edge of the lake. Moonlight shimmered across it, stars reflecting their iridescence. He sat on the cool grass, which felt good after the long walk.  
  
Why did he feel so bad? This was his last day at Hogwarts! He would finally be leaving this place!  
  
Leaving her.  
  
He put his head in his hands. He wasn't going to kid himself anymore. For the past year, he had been feeling it worse then ever, but he had neglected it, not wanting to believe what was true for the past seven years.  
  
He was, like it or not, very much in love with Hermione Granger.  
  
~~~~~~  
  
*Come up to meet you*  
  
*Tell you I'm sorry*  
  
*You don't know how lovely you are*  
  
* I had to find you*  
  
* Tell you I need you*  
  
* Tell you I set you apart*  
  
*Tell me your secrets*  
  
*And ask me your questions*  
  
*Oh let's go back to the start*  
  
* Running in circles*  
  
*Coming up tails*  
  
* Heads on a silence apart*  
  
~~~~~~  
  
He looked across the lake, bitter truth suddenly dawning on him. He had a chance to love her, but now that chance was gone. More than anything, Draco wanted to go to her, tell her he was sorry, tell her he was sorry he had made her life a living hell. He hadn't meant to. He wished he hadn't.  
  
His mind wandered slowly to his father. His father, 'the pureblood.' Suddenly, Draco didn't care about that anymore. Why had he ever? What did someone's background have to do with anything important? The word, "important" flashed through his mind. His father had always told him who you're parents were, and how much money you had was important. But suddenly, Draco didn't care about any of that. Right now, he would give anything in the world to switch places with Ron Weasley, poor, lowly Weasley. At least he had love.  
  
Draco picked up a small rock and threw it forcefully at that lake. It made a sound that no one heard.  
  
~~~~~~  
  
*Nobody said it was easy*  
  
*It's such a shame for us to part*  
  
*Nobody said it was easy*  
  
*No one ever said it would be this hard*  
  
*Oh take me back to the start*  
  
*I was just guessing*  
  
*At numbers and figures*  
  
*Pulling your puzzles apart*  
  
*Questions of science*  
  
*Science and progress*  
  
*Do not speak as loud as my heart*  
  
~~~~~~  
  
In little pieces, parts of his time with her came back. Precious time, that could never come back. The first time he saw her at school........ Jinxing her in potions........ Laughing at her when the basilisk was paralyzing people......... Seeing her at the Yule ball with that Victor Krum, (she looked so pretty)......... Calling her a mudblood.  
  
Without warning, the accusing word resounded in his head. Mudblood. Why had he called her that? Why couldn't he have been nice to her, just once? Why oh did his reputation matter so much?  
  
He didn't know, but he didn't care. He just wanted to go back, back to the very first time he saw her the entrance hall, and instead of sneering and making fun of Potter, just stay in line until he could get to know everyone.  
  
~~~~~~  
  
*Tell me you love me*  
  
*Come back and haunt me*  
  
~~~~~~  
  
Where did he go wrong? Why did he have to hide his feelings? Was he really that pathetic? He could have had her, he could have had her instead of that stinking Ron Weasley.  
  
But not now. Now she was gone. Forever.  
  
~*~  
  
Remember, cool kids review. 


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